Divorce is something that happens quite frequently in today's world. In fact, between 40 and 50 percent of marriages will eventually end in divorce. This can sometimes be a good thing for couples that are unable to work it out, but it can be a hard and traumatic experience for children.
In order to make this hard experience easier on the children, there are a number of things that should be done to help the child cope and get through the first few years of heartache.
Helping Children Cope with Divorce
1. Ensure Consistency. Often times in a divorce, custody is split between the parents. It is important for the child to feel consistency in both homes. The rules and routines should be the same. Although your marriage has ended, you should still work together as parents of the children to ensure their well-being.
2. Be Prepared. Telling a child is never an easy thing. Be prepared with how you should break the news in the gentlest way possible. You will also need to be prepared with answers to the child's questions.
a. Where will I live?
b. What school will I go to?
c. Will I still see both of you?
d. Who will I live with?
These are all questions that are legitimate and will help put the child's mind a little more at ease if you are prepared to answer them.
3. Show Love and Restraint. More than anything, a child will need to feel loved by both parents during this time. Restrain yourself from talking negatively about the other parent. This will cause the child even more heart ache and stress than before.
4. Be Understanding. Your child may tell you that they hate you. They may cry for hours on end. Let them know that it is okay to be emotional and that anger is natural emotion to feel. Children will not understand the complexities of marriage and will not understand why you were divorce. By understanding their feelings and by giving simple answers, you will help them get a hold of their emotions over time.
5. Don't be Selfish. A qualified divorce lawyer will help with all the legal issues pertaining to custody of the child. It is important to do the best thing for the child. It may mean full custody, partial custody, or no custody but if it is in the best interest of the child, no matter how hard it is for you, it needs to be done.
Experiencing the divorce of parents can be the most difficult thing that a child can go through. It is essential that you take all the necessary actions to help the children cope with this situation.Share
24 November 2014